How to stop caring what others think of you
Worrying too much about what other people think can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, because the way we think starts to become the way we behave.
These individuals become people-pleaser and are overly accommodating to others, thinking it will stop them from being judged. In fact, the opposite is true. Most people don’t like push-overs and are turned off by it. The behavior we use in an attempt to please others, can actually cause the opposing effect. This means that if you’re a push-over, then you’re going to be attracting others in your life who are also push-overs. Vice versa. This can be quite a dangerous path to go down if you don’t recognize its consequences., you forget what you’re…
It’s been said that we are the average of the five people we hang out with the most. When we start to attract and associate with the same people that share our weaknesses —we’re stuck. We stop growing, because there’s no one to challenge us to be better. We start thinking that this is the norm and we remain comfortable. This is not a place you want to be.
Now let’s talk about the cure. Here are five ways to stop giving a [email protected]$%.
Reclaiming Your Freedom
1. Know Your Values
First and foremost. You need to know what’s important to you in life, what you truly value, and what you’re ultimately aiming for. Once you know who you really are and what matters to you, what other people think of you becomes significantly less important. When you know your values, you’ll have something to stand up for —something you believe in.
You’ll stop saying yes to everything. Instead, you’ll learn to say no when friends pressure you to go bar-hopping, or when a tempting business opportunity distracts you from your business. When you have your values straight, you have your shit straight.
2. Put Yourself Out There
Now that you know what your values are, it’s time to put yourself out there. This can be done several ways. Here are a few suggestions:
- Wearing a polka-dot sweater
- Public Speaking
- Flirting/Asking someone out
Keep in mind that when you’re doing any of these activities, you have to speak your mind. Be honest with yourself and what you share, because the world doesn’t need another conflict-avoider who does what everyone else does.
3. Surround Yourself with Pros
Surround yourself with people who are self-assured, and live life without comprising their core values. These people will rub off on you quickly.
One of my best friends, Cody, has been a big influence on me. Having spent the summer with him, I’ve observed countless times where he strongly voiced his opinion on controversial topics. What I learned was that he was simply voicing opinions that people already had in their heads, but were too afraid to voice. People admired him for being so honest and direct, even when they disagreed with his views. Thanks for not giving a [email protected]$%, Cody.
4. Create a “Growth List”
OK, now we’re getting personal. I haven’t told anyone this, but I have this list called the “Growth List.” A Growth List is comprised of all the things in life that makes you uncomfortable. These are fears, insecurities—anything that gives you the jitters. Here’s how it works.
You start by writing all the things that make you feel uncomfortable. Then one-by-one, you do them. Once you complete the task, you move on to the next. Repeat
My first growth task was taking a cold shower (The Flinch). I turned the water as cold as it could get, and I could feel my body shake before I even entered the shower. This was the inner bullshit voice in my head talking. It was hard at first. But surprisingly, it got easier the second time. Then even easier the third time. Before I knew it, my body stopped shaking—I was no longer uncomfortable; I’d conquered my fear.
This exercise does wonders. I have yet to find a better way to get out of my comfort zone. You can read all the books in the world about being confident or getting over your fears, but if you don’t take action, you’re just someone who’s read how to ride a bicycle without ever having ridden one.
5. Travel Alone
If you’re looking for an ultimate transformation that combines all of the points above, you should travel alone. Traveling with other people can be fun, but you won’t get the opportunity to truly get out of your comfort zone. You’ll be exposed to different social cultures, break social norms that you didn’t even know existed, and ultimately, be forced to burst out of your small bubble.
Bring as little as possible, and fit everything into one backpack. Plan nothing, except for a one-way flight ticket to your destination—figure everything else out when you’re there. Trust me, you’ll be just fine. It won’t be easy initially, but don’t get discouraged. Being comfortable with the uncomfortable will grow with time. I continue to struggle with it everyday, as do many others. But you need to get started today.
The world is already full of people who obey the status quo. But the people who don’t give a [email protected]$% are the ones that change the world. Be the latter. Start living life the way you want, be fearless like you once were as a child, and always, always stand up for the truth. Someone has to.http://the-conscious-mind.com/how-to-stop-caring-what-others-think-of-you/http://the-conscious-mind.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/happiness.jpghttp://the-conscious-mind.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/happiness-150x150.jpgLifecaring,freedom,growth,travel alone