9 Signs you are in an abusive relationship and need to get out
1. You’re on a daily emotional roller coaster
One minute your significant other is loving and the next, punishing you for not doing things correctly. This is a major red flag. Manipulation plays a huge role in most abusive relationships. This constant emotional roller coaster ride of arguments and apologies is definitely unhealthy and a sign it’s time to walk away.
2. They isolate you
It’s one thing for your spouse to love spending quality time with you but when the person you’re with starts isolating you from family and friends, there’s a problem. It’s healthy for you to have relationships outside of the relationship with your significant other. Don’t let them tell you otherwise.
3. Issues of jealousy
An emotionally abusive partner or spouse isn’t just jealous of the people you’re closest with but also your dreams and goals because they want to control all aspects of your life. A secure person doesn’t need to be jealous of the relationship you have with others because they trust you and the relationship you’ve created together.
4. You’re nervous around them
Abusive partners and spouses will use any tactic they can to keep you down, including threats of violence as a way to assert their dominance over you. If you feel any form of fear around the person you’re in a relationship with, it’s time to walk away.
5. Constant put downs
No matter what you do in the relationship, it’s never right and it’s never enough. When you talk to them, especially about your accomplishments, they put you down and make you feel small for the decisions you made.
6. You go out of your way to make them happy
Nothing’s wrong with wanting to keep your significant other happy but when you find yourself pleading for their happiness, there’s an issue. You may even find yourself staying silent even when you’re angry just to keep the peace.
7. You feel trapped
Helplessness is an ever-present emotion in emotionally abusive relationships. Often times, abusive partners will try controlling all aspects of your life, including personal items like your car and phone and what you do with your spare time. It you’re feeling trapped, it’s time to take the leap of faith and walk away.
8. You start believing you’re the problem
After all the arguments and put downs, you start believing that you’re not worth any more than the abuse. This is simply a manipulation tactic and a way to justify the abuse. You’re not crazy or the problem. You’re worth so much more.
9. Arguments tend to escalate, quickly
Occasional arguments are not uncommon in relationships, and are not always unhealthy but arguments in emotionally abusive relationships are. These arguments tend to escalate quickly and have no end point. Even day-to-day conversation can escalate to physical abuse, so beware.