11 Signs he’s definitely not the one
What if you don’t have the feeling that something is missing — and everything seems dreamily headed toward Happily Ever After? Then how do you tell whether he truly is Mr. Right or Mr. So Wrong It Isn’t Funny?
You make excuses for him all the time.
No matter what he does or doesn’t do (whether it’s standing you up at the last minute or forgetting your birthday), you make excuses for him to anyone and everyone (including yourself) even though you know that behavior isn’t alright.
Instead of trying to resist what’s actually happening, try bravely listening to your fears and concerns. What truths are you avoiding when you shine over his behavior with excuses?
You can’t be yourself around him
Does he criticise you all the time? Do you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells, in a desperate bid to avoid upsetting him? Do you act differently around him than you do with your family and friends? Do you pretend to like / dislike things to avoid conflict?
If you have said yes to any of these questions, he’s not The One. You want to be with someone who loves you, just the way you are – not someone who makes you feel small, or afraid, or frightened.
You constantly feel frustrated and confused by your man’s actions.
He says all the right things (a.k.a. the things you want to hear) but his actions don’t align. You’re left feeling baffled and frustrated and neither feeling is going away.
When words and actions don’t line up, it’s so tempting to focus on the pretty words. But the truth is always found in his action. Actions seldom lie and they speak loud and clear.
You don’t trust him
Maybe you caught him in a few lies but you were hoping they were just little lies and nothing to worry about. Actually you are wrong. The right person would have no problem communicating with you even the hardest things and deepest secrets. If he thinks he needs to keep a part of his life separated and hidden from you, then he does not respect you enough to share everything with you and take down his mask to show his true face to you.
You bring out the worst in each other (mirroring)
You are out to destroy each other whether intentionally or unintentionally. You treat each other in ways you would not expect yourself to treat someone else, or accept the same treatment from someone else, yet it happens with this person. Unless you are really determined to get to the bottom of it by exploring your own emotional wounds and healing them chances are, you are subjecting yourself to more damage than good, psychologically speaking.
You’re not a priority
If he is always going out without checking in with you, or if he constantly makes plans with you and then breaks them to do something else, you are not his priority.
If you aren’t his priority, it’s a safe bet that he isn’t the one.
You’re the one who puts in all the effort
If you find you are the only one calling, inviting and planning and he is just going along with it half-heartedly, then (we hate to say it, but) he’s just not that into you.
Stop calling and inviting and see what happens. You may find out he’s not The One quicker than you may have guessed…
You can’t communicate with him
Communication is one of the basic foundations of a successful relationship.
If you find it difficult to communicate with him, regarding issues, your feelings, or even just everyday events, then you can probably safely say that he isn’t the one.
Being affectionate in a relationship is something that you need to have.
Closeness is so important in a relationship and you lose that when you aren’t affectionate with each other, especially in private.
Your friends don’t like him
We know it’s a cliché, but you should always take it as a red flag if you’re friends don’t like the guy you’re seeing. They have your best interests at heart and they want you to be happy – they wouldn’t kick up a fuss if it wasn’t serious, trust us.
You feel sad, or frustrated, more often than you feel happy
Relationships aren’t picnics; we know that they take work, and effort, and that they have their ups and downs. But if your relationship leaves you feeling unhappy more often than it does happy, then something is very wrong. Take a step back, look at what you have, and work out if it’s really worth it. We have a feeling that you might discover it’s not…
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